DISCLAIMER : The Godhatesgoths website, Parents Against Goth Movement and Gods Hammer Baptist Church are complete works of fiction. It is a satire/parody. When you use godhatesgoths.com you are agreeing and consenting to our terms and conditions of use which we, at our sole discretion, may change in any way at any time. Furthermore we do not guarantee that any of the materials or articles or content on this site will contain no errors, nor that they will be accurate in the slightest. Nor do we state that we agree in anyway with any of the content or views or beliefs within these articles, or with the fictional views of the fictional character Rev RG Green, or any of his fictional followers or fictional members of his fictional Church. This site is meant to be viewed as black humor, parody and satire on very real people and organizations out there, who DO think Goth and metal is the devil's music. For more information on people who really are speaking out against rock and Goth music please view our resources section.  For our complete terms and conditions please email us, and we will be pleased to supply them in full. Thank you and I hope you enjoy our site.




The website exhibits such knowledge of what ISN'T goth, that in my opinion it could only have been written by goths or close friends of goths.

Making a mockery of the sanctity of religious dogma and scripture, the hypocracy of religion, the mass media, Enlightenment thinking all at once! When you finally realize that you have been had, it reminds you exactly how susceptible you are to the powers of media and dogma.

How often do characters in gothic literature discover some ancient text of forbidden knowledge and blindly trusting it get into a heap of trouble? By the same token, blindly dismissing it seems to get them into a heap of trouble as well.


and yet, all organized religions and the mainstream media expect you to do exactly that: Get all your facts from 1 source. No one suggests you should be open minded, read the competitors newspaper and try to think critically. No one suggests any method for you to gauge which newssource is most reliable? They talk about irrelevant numbers such as popularity, or the numbers of affiliates they have, or the numbers of viewers/worshippers.

How can you know what to believe?

godhatesgoths.com is awesome!


"Ben Smith" sumgye@hotmail.com

Congratulations on a well constructed piece of satire.


"Aubrey Baginski" aubrey@auditoria.us

Thank you so much. Some friends of mine linked your website to me, and it really brightened my day. it is far and away the funniest thing I've seen on the internet in quite some time. I can recall the last time I laughed so hard at work.  So thank you. thank you for taking the time to share your views with the rest of us.  And please, update the merchandise link. I can't wait to but your t-shirts.


Tony tbins@comcast.net

Man, I wish I could shake your hand and congradulate you on your awesome sence of humor.  I am serious, you are one of the few people I've run across with the talent it takes to create a real piece of work such as this.  Bravo.



Thanks for the laugh! It's good to see people still have a sense of humor these day :)

DJ Vitus - www.clubsatori.com


"Ms Bathory" <ms_bathory@hotmail.com>

OMG..... LMAO.... just wanted to say, your site is hillarious! :D


"Your Mom" redxxrainbows@hotmail.com

I found your website through a friend of mine and let me tell you, it was the funniest damn thing I have ever seen in my life. Sheer brilliance, I couldn't stop laughing. The kind of laugh where you're not sure whether or not you're going to vomit up your intestines. Oh, and won't you join me for a cup of blood while we punch kittens and bang our heads to White Zombie? Alice Cooper made me do it, AIEEEEEE!

P.S. I like the terrorist part, because we all know that Muslims are goths. Ciao!


"Adam Ellis" adamellis338@msn.com

funniest website ive seen in awhile :) CHEERS


"Ms Goff" eek_a_gawt@yahoo.com

Seriously entertaining. You should have a god hates emos site. That'll kill 'em.


"Jen - Jenmodel.com" jenmodel@jenmodel.com

I laughed SO FUCKING HARD.  What a work of genius. Absolute genius. I can't believe people are taking this shit seriously


"Adrian Alberto Quiros Sauceda" quiros.adrian@gmail.com

Funny and simply brilliant. I should write about this someday. I can't just see nothing but irony.…funny.



The Rev,

Upon further reading, I have decided this site has to be a joke… fantastic work pointing out the obvious shortcomings of fundamentalist Christian crackpots! The deliberate spelling and grammar mistakes make a superb example of the inverse correlation between faith and intelligence! Well Done!! A parody worthy of the

highest prestige!


"Lauren Schricker" lsnickers113@yahoo.com

I feel like a fuckin' moron now, haha.  I didn't realize your site was a parody!

Well, you did a really good job, it seemed exactly like other sites that are actually real!


"Jerry Taucher" gravityzone600@hotmail.com

I read your site, godhatesgoths.com. It's hilarious. Keep up the good work.


"demon spawn" d3m0nsp4wn@gmail.com

Hey man,

You almost took me in for a moment there! I must compliment you on your excellent satire. You're right up there with landoverbaptist.com.

I must say, though, that it does draw attention to the moronic fundamentalist attitude of some of those Xian freaks - the way the US is going, teaching creationism in schools, you'd suspect their next move was to reintroduce witch-burning!

Thanks for the laughs.




Widereddragon ebaythings@speshk99.f2s.com

I never knew hitler was a goth, that explains his great taste in uniforms! All is clear.

Happy hunting.


"will richardson" grimrobedemos@yahoo.com

you should post all the hate mail you get, everyone would get a laugh out of it

but really, i think this site is so terrible i think it gave me cancer


"Richie Sheehan" thoin@hotmail.com

haha funniest thing I've seen in eons.. brilliant

Richie from ireland


"Matt ----" paroxysmus9@yahoo.com

Oh man, I love the godhates goths site, it's so freaking funny. I have no idea where you get the idea for all this but it's got me and tons of my friends rolling around with laughter.

Awesome job at making fun of the christians, I can't get enough of those psychotic fascist sites from those so dellusional with fear.

Keep up the great work I'm definitely gonna link this site around for every one to laugh with you. Awesome awesome job, I could never think of jokes like that.


"Eden Beast" eden_beast@msn.com

I don't think I've ever seen such a funny website that does such a great deadpan pisstake of ignorant bigoted American Xians before. More please.


"Michelle C. Reynolds" michelle@seoone.com

This could really turn into a good satire site. I know a lot of people are looking at it now on my blog communites and getting a good laugh, even the ones that aren't goth!


"Jason Berntson" thereisnospork8@hotmail.com

Seriously, you are a genius.

This is the funniest website I have ever been to! It is the largest and most well-crafted joke I have ever seen. You are a clever person, to come up with something so hilarious. Honestly! You're a genius! You have a great sense of humor. I especially love the thing about how goths wanted to cause 9/11, and that Osama bin Laden was inspired by them! Haha, oh man, that was classic. I should use that in a plotline in my new story. Or how Dungeons & Dragons and Harry Potter are embodiments of Satan. Seriously, you are a funny man. I'm not joking and I'm not being sarcastic. I'm not mocking you either. This is the greatest thing I've ever read.

Here are a few of my favorite parts:

"2. Through fantasy role playing games like Dungeons & Dragons "

"Goth is a culture that makes suicide cool and cutting  yourself the

'in' thing."

"You need to help your child to realise that anti-social behaviour is

not normal, and she should embrace life with both hands, at that age

she could be a cheer-leader or dress in bright happy colors and

attract the right kind of friends."

"We are seeing more and more children coming onto our forums every

year telling us of their abusive life, telling us they are all rape

victims. Well what do they expect? If you dress like trash, men will

think you're easy and treat you like trash. It's really noones fault

but their own. You play, you pay."

"Many gothic parents are drug addicts. Who looks after the children

when they are hooked on crystal meth or crack cocain? No-one, they

probably lie screaming for attention when their parents lie stoned

and incapable."

"Playing them loud abusive metal music with lyrics about murder and

rape when these children should be listening to nursery rhymes.

Subjecting them to the evils of MTV when they should be watching

looney-tunes and cartoons appropriate for children."

"When their children end up dead, hooked on crack or violently raped

it will be noones fault but their own."

"I am willing to bet that every goth parent owns at least one horror

film that deals with witchcraft or vampirism, or has a Harry Potter

novel, or book on wicca or the supernatural, or has clothes of a

perverse nature."

Best of all were all these comments from you Goth terrorists section:

"They posted these plans on the internet, on web pages and in online

journals, in the hope that many other Goths would inspired by it.

Their dream was to kill at least 500 of their classmates with two

20-pound propane bombs and their artillery of guns, before going on a

bloody and murderous rampage attacking neighbouring homes, climaxing

in hijacking a 747 full of passengers and crashing it into the World

Trade Centre. Their goal was to achieve a body count in the


"Was it on purpose then that Bin Laden chose Dylan's birthday as the

date to carry out these attacks, as a mark of respect and admiration

for the boy who gave him the ideas and inspiration in the first

place? I have no doubt."

Seriously, that section would make a great story. You should patent it and make it into a novel. It would probably be a best-seller!

I only scratched the surface here. Most of the stuff I read here was pretty funny.

You are a genius.

Thanks for making my day.


"Dave SKAARUP" skaarup@eastlink.ca


In one word, that about sums up this entire website.  Hi-larious. Keep up the good work. Mind you, I'm not gothic, goth-like, nor a goth sympathizer, but your Extremist views on the whole youth subcultre brings tears of laughter to my eyes.

Equating the two assholes behind Columbine with a world-wide Terrorist network? How many 17 year olds do you know are capable of hijacking the largest model of airliner, then successfully navigating it from Colorado to New York?

And your "The Devil's Music" section cracks me up.

Keep up the good work Rev.  Yer fightin' the good fight.


"Rebecca Fox" blitzkrieg_death000@yahoo.com

You've deffinatly have given us goth people a good laugh.

Thanks! you've brightened my -oh-so-black-and-dreadful-day.-

psyclon nine is the devil!


Hesy failtech@gmail.com


at first, great homepage.somwhere on the internet i found some information about goths beeing the reason for the extinction of dinosaurs.i really don´t know where i found it, but i hope you know about this theory and can include it to your homepage.

best wishes and praise the lord!